We might be crazy...

...but we are adding another baby to our family.

With how horrible Gavin's labor was, I was really nervous thinking about ever having a third baby.  When Gavin was 14 months, I was with friends and they started sharing labor stories.  My body started getting really hot, my hands started to sweat, and I got shaky and teared up remembering the trauma my body went through when I had him.  Robie and I always said we wanted to have our kids about 2 years apart if we could, but I found myself pushing back and wanting to wait and wait...and wait when that time came for us to try and get pregnant with #3.

Eventually, I decided it was inevitable if we were ever going to have more kids, so I sucked it up and called my doctor for Clomid.  After a few months, I took a test and it said POSITIVE.  I was a little scared knowing there was no turning back at that point, and it honestly took a while for my mind to register that I was for reals pregnant.  Since having a miscarriage, I never fully believe there is a tiny human in my belly until I see a heartbeat on an ultrasound.  When we had our ultrasound and saw the little flicker on the screen, I got really emotional and it really sunk in that we are going to be parents again.

When I was pregnant with Jaxon and Gavin, I was nauseous a lot but I never ever threw up.  I had aversions to certain foods, so I ate a lot of crackers and cereal.  Both pregnancies were pretty mild for the most part, other than normal third trimester problems.  This time is a completely different story. I have been so sick.  For my first trimester, I threw up every other day and some days I had to force myself to eat a piece of bread.  In those first few weeks, everything looked, smelled, and tasted horrible to me.  I got physically exhausted from simply walking up the stairs.  I have lost 10 lbs, which is crazy to me since the only two things I can hold down are fries and Coca-Cola.    

Now that I am 14 weeks, things have been getting a little better.  I haven't thrown up in a couple weeks, but I still randomly dry heave and gag at smells, food, and thoughts of food (just typing the word "food" made me gag just now). I am eating a little more, but I still have to force myself to eat a full meal sometimes.  Hopefully with every week that passes I will feel better and better, but I am not complaining because I know the symptoms are good and mean my body is doing what it should be doing to create life. 

We find out very soon if we are having a girl or a boy.  My number one concern is that the baby is healthy, but I won't lie...I would be really excited to finally buy pink since this is probably our last baby.  We did the Shettles Method to try and conceive a girl, so we will see how that works out. Obviously it is 50/50, and whatever person we are meant to have is who we will have.  I know whoever that little person is, he/she is already so loved by all of us.  Jaxon asks me every day if my belly is growing bigger, and he is counting down the days until the baby comes.  My official due date is April 22, 2015.